Who?

Either someone out there who has the same name as me incidently dropped by and read my blog and actually decided to leave a tag. OR, there is an IMPOSTER!! Make me look so blur on my own blog also... =_="" I may be blur, but not blur until like that okie..

Had a rather long and nicely indepth talk yesterday with Adam. And I've decided that the only why I'll ever stop feeling hurt and he'll stop hurting me would be unless I leave him. But speaking from experience(the don't-know-how-many-ampteen-times i tried to leave him..) I don't really think that is possible.. coz I like him far too much to actually not care about him. And he is to thick in the head and full of himself and flirtatious, I don't think he'll ever change.

And so! My only solution is for time to past. I read on a personality test thing this morning that my 'fresh' meter normally only works for a year max(and up till now, that has been rather accurate, my longest relationship is 1 yr 1 month?) So, I'll just have to wait till it's about a year, and I'll start to stop liking him. ^_^ then I'll be happy, and find ease in leaving him I guess. Silly way of thinking and probably a form of denial.. Oh well..

Went to NTU for the medical checkup today. Nothing much to talk about that, other than that I didn't know that taking X-rays were such a fast process.. Almost like a factory operation. Anyway, had to go to the X-ray clinic place for X-ray which landed me in Jurong Point.. boredom of all boredoms.. I had virtually nothing to do there and no one was avaliable to accompany me as well.. ended up having mos burger for dinner(?)(coz I was wondering around aimlessly and was starting to feel hungry, but it was only 1645, and I'm still not hungry now..) I had quite some food though.. had a yakiniku rice burger, a small pack of fries and 5 piece nuggets.

I must say this to everyone.. Mc's nuggets are probably made of chicken poop.

I think I like Mos's nuggets the most...(at the very least you can see the meat tissue and not just a plup of... can I even call it chicken?) And their mustard.. I love their mustard.. this tangy vineger taste always makes food taste so nice..and today.. I just realised that.. if you have the fries in their mustard 1st, and then on the next bite have their chilli sauce instead, the taste is simply heavenly. The nice combination of the vineger in the mustard still on your tongue mixed with the sweet and slightly spicy chilli sauce on their fat and solid fries.. yum.. knock out.

And I managed to do some french revision and excercises while I was there as well. Which made it pretty alright actually. Wanted to go clubbing tonight initially...but guess not.. getting lazy now... think sleeping might just be the better alternative.

And with regards to nudity and sexuality issues.. As long as everyone is clear of what are the consequences and responsibilities, I guess there isn't much to object about.. just that, I think I might just be a little more moral about it.. No matter how much I don't think it's particularly wrong, I can't really put myself though it, or atleast(I think) not feel guilty after.

okie comments are up.

hey, been a little while since I blogged. For the benefit of readers who have something serious and relatively long to say about my posts. I have put up the comments for you.

It's been awhile.

I haven't been home alot these few days. Adam is back.. and I'm feeling rather happy around him. Although it's still painful to see him sometimes. The inspiration for all my sad music. We talked a little about our relationship again yesterday over dinner. And I started running away again. Good enough he did pursue, and we had a rather delicious dinner in robertson walk. yum! sketches is a great place to eat! everyone should try their blueberry juice, it has got real blue berries in it.. absolutely marvelous.

And what made it better was that, there is this mediterreanian dance performance thing going on there.. So, all we had to do was to walk across the river to get, good food and good performance on a WEDNESDAY night and it's just fantastic.

Finally got to watch Spanglish as well. A good film I must say. With very interesting and beautiful charactors. Next up, will be A Very Long Engagement. I'll try to not use too much of the subtitles this time round, and see if I can understand any of it.

Talking about french films. We(my french classmates and I) managed to persuade our teacher to let us watch Les Choristes in our french class(which had a staggering turn up of 7 out of 16 last week). It was a very pretty film. And I'd recommend it to everyone. Another one of those teacher-touches-bad-students-heart-and-kaboom-all-become-good-students film. but it's nice with all the singing.. :P

Bullshit

Got home yesterday and saw on the papers 2 full pages about some girl who posted her nude pics on her blog. The publishers must have been really free, ran out of things to write/report about or just decided that paper wasn't something worth saving or giving a shit about.

Well, I know that blog actually, it belongs to somebody who is a 2nd degree 'friend'.. Sincerely speaking, I don't see what's wrong with it. I mean, okie, it's against the law and 'immoral' suppositly, but, it's supposed to be a blog. if anything, though it's on the net, you don't have to read it. If one wants to read it, then don't complain about it's explicite language or pictures. In anycase, though the pictures weren't exactly portrayed as art, but there really aren't that many and they are not explicite. If anything, it's the language and content, why only pin point at the pictures?

*Just to make things clear. I do read the blog every now and then as I find her way of writing/her writing style or so to say, a pleasure to read, and she does have rather interesting(crude, yes, but interesting) opinions about life, the world and art that I find worth in reading.

So what exactly is in the law? Visual language is acceptable but not pictures? The written contents is so much more explicite and no one gave a damn until the pics came up. And all the news paper article focused on was the fact that the pictures were of nudity. There is only one picture that's of blatant nudity, and it wasn't even crude.

Maybe it's just Singaporeans? Are we being alittle too conservative and small brained? What's the big fuss up over just a photo when we can tolerate all the rest of the contents? What is it about visual articles that is so provocative? If it's like really explicite or sexual without any artistic value I can understand the resentment, this is just absurd. Our understanding and portrayal of sexuality is just so backward and remarkably immature.

To feel offensed by sexual or immoral articles is natural for people of conservative values. But to feel offensed, or rather deeply offensed, just because of visual nudity, is plain immaturity.

To anyone who feels like the blog is disturbing you, get a life. Stop reading it if you don't like it's contents. If not. Stop being a hypocrite while secretly savouring the flavourful events of somebody elses life, and feeding your own sick little wormy brain.

fatal attraction

The thrill of life.

A hundred and one things I've never seen and I thought I'd never get to see.

He, is the cutest thing on earth.
He, is probably the gay-est one as well.
Oh, well, he says that he isn't.
Does it matter? NO!

Well, either or, I got to know Mr Singapore Universe!! Manhunt 2nd runner up and Mr Intercontinental... Haha... he is so awfully gay.. it's actually charming. :P well, he says that he is not gay, and that he likes girls, but sad to say, more guys hit on him than girls.. whahahaa.. His smile can melt gold..

He is going to get me a portfolio. Will have to go on a diet for it.. :P hope everything turns out well!

And like all the smart asses in the world. There is this one.

http://www.msnmarketing.co.kr/2005/04/msg_webcam/swf/movie_03.swf

Cute MV.

http://ippc11.csie.nctu.edu.tw/tccb/tccb_dv/play_video.php?ID=171

Rather creative, made by some University students in Taiwan. Take a look!!

action is the reaction of intention.

okie, I've got something to say about the 'I've done my best' and the 'I've got the intention' thing again.

I find that many a time, people tend to say they have done their best when they clearly haven't and I'm pretty damn sure they know they haven't. Sure, they often act like they are doing all they can, but they weren't trying to solve the problem at all. Just surface work.

There are more than one way to tackle different situations, and if one only tried one way and didn't even try to explore or take effort in finding other ways, he has not even TRIED his best, lets not talk about doing his best.

And to say that he's got the intention to do it, is pure bull shit. Intention is a state of mind, action is the reaction of intention. If the action is in sufficient or in appropriate and nothing is done about it. There is evidently something wrong with the intention itself. Either, the intention wasn't strong enough or there wasn't really such an intention at all..

And so I ponder. If someone does things without true intention, and that I have only words to hold on to. should I even attempt to have faith in him? Is there a reason or a point that I should. Words are like smokes on the waters. They don't do anything other than beautifying the place or making vision unclear...

It's so difficult to have faith in people when they don't even try.

Wise words.

For every second you don't put in your best, you'll have to spend the next hour trying even harder.